


Truth Beneath The Rose

by SeachelleTheTideborn



Category: Overwatch (Video Game)
Genre: Angst, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Dark Past, Death, Drinking, Drinking to Cope, Emotional Hurt, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, F/M, Heavy Angst, Hurt, Hurt/Comfort, Memories, Past Violence, Past teenager Jesse McCree, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Recovery, bad memories
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-06-05
Updated: 2018-06-05
Packaged: 2019-05-18 11:03:24
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,567
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14851527
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SeachelleTheTideborn/pseuds/SeachelleTheTideborn
Summary: McCree has a past that haunts him. He's finally going to tell y/n about it. He needs comfort because this poor man has been through hell.





	Truth Beneath The Rose

**Author's Note:**

> Just a quick little something inspired by Truth Beneath The Rose by Within Temptation
> 
> https://youtu.be/F-ofmiUaejA

_"Give me strength to face the truth, the doubt within my soul_  
_No longer I can justify the bloodshed in his name_  
_Is it a sin to seek the truth, the truth beneath the rose?_  
_Pray with me so I will find the gate to Heaven's door"_

"McCree?" You knocked on his door and it slowly opened with a low toned squeak. He had been MIA for a few days and you were starting to worry about him. Soldier 76 had said he got like this once a year. It was the reason he never went to him first for any missions lately unless they were at the Route 66 area.

"I need to talk to him, Jack..."

"It's best to let him be at times like this. He will be alright in a few days." He had told you but you just weren't satisfied with this answer so you instantly went to investigate yourself.

Upon entry, the strong smell of alcohol made your sinuses burn. It was overwhelming and made you nearly step back out of the room. Your determination made you keep going. He wasn't in the living room, nor the kitchen. There were, however, tons of empty bottles. You knew McCree drank every now and then but you had never seen this much within a few days. Something was terribly wrong...

It was dark and you nearly tripped over the rug in front of the bedroom door. But, the door was locked when you tried opening it.

"Jesse?" You called and knocked, "Jesse, can you open the door please? We need to talk."

No answer, and that made you worry even more. There was this gut instinct that settled badly in your stomach and you knew for a fact that something was indeed wrong. His name was called out a few more times, each time it came out even more shaky than before.

_"I believed it would justify the means_  
_It had a hold over me_  
_Blinded to see the cruelty of the beast_  
_It is the darker side of me_  
_The veil of my dreams deceived all I have seen_  
_Forgive me for what I have been_  
_Forgive me my sins"_

Eventually, you decided to kick the door in. It took you a few tries until it you finally just threw your entire body against it. The whole thing fell down and you scanned the room. McCree was still no where to he seen. The bed was neatly made but there were empty bottles on the bedside table. No lights were on so you tapped the touch lamp to its brightest. The room was so neat and clean. His serape was folded on the bed and there was an old picture on top of it. There was a happy family in the picture from a quick glance. A mother, Father, and two babies.

A sound came from the bathroom, making you rush to the open door. There sat Jesse, shirtless and half asleep on the floor against the bathtub with his hair pulled back in a tight ponytail. From the looks of it, he had been puking his guts out before you showed up. The smell of vomit didn't bother you, considering what was going on. The love of your life was on the floor, eyes closed and sweating badly. An empty whiskey bottle sat by his side.

"Jesse..." You gently straddled his legs and cupped his face, "Jesse, can you wake up for me?"

His answer was a gurgle followed by a groan. It made you want to cry to see him in such a state. Clearly, he was drinking to drown out a depression of sorts. You'd seen this before after a friend of yours had done the same thing once. You grabbed a washcloth and soaked it in cold water, splashing it on his face. He woke up with a loud gasp.

_"Pray for me cause I have lost my faith in holy wars_  
_Is paradise denied to me cause I can't take no more_  
_Has darkness taken over me, consumed my mortal soul_  
_All my virtues sacrificed, can Heaven be so cruel?"_

"Y/n...?"

"Jesse, you scared me. What are you doing, huh?" You asked gently, cupping his cheeks again.

"Makin' it go away... It happened... Yesterday was the day... All those years ago." He wasn't making much sense.

"Jesse... Talk to me, tell me what happened to make you do this to yourself..." You spoke while continuing to wash his arms and chest.

"I'm goin' straight to hell for this shit, ya know?"

"What shit?"

He closed his eyes and sniffled, "I had a family once... I was young, too young but I made sure they were taken care of..."

You stopped yourself from gasping at this. You never would have guessed he was the family type. Somehow, You managed to focus on washing his neck with the cool wet cloth.

"What happened, Jesse?"

"Deadlock happened..." 

There was no way this story had a happy ending with Deadlock involved...

"They heard of my skills with the gun. They asked me to join, I refused. They weren't happy 'bout that. They took my family hostage. If I joined them, then they would be taken care of. If not... They'd kill em. I did terrible things for those Deadlock bastards. The shit I did still fuckin' haunts me to this very day. I did so many terrible things, y/n. But it didn't matter." He leaned forward and started shaking. "I failed em... Overwatch found us and I tried gettin' my family out before any thing could happen to them. In the chaos, everyone was either distracted or dead so I figured it was now or never. I had to help them escape so they could live. One of the gang leaders decided that no one was gettin' out of this situation...."

_"I'm hoping, I'm praying_  
_I won't get lost between two worlds_  
_For all I have seen the truth lies in between_  
_Give me the strength to face the wrong that I have done_  
_Now that I know the darkest side of me"_

Tears were streaming down the cowboy's face and you just noticed the tears falling from your own eyes at hearing his story. You didn't want to hear the rest but Jesse was suffering, keeping such a thing to himself for so long had taken a toll.

"He shot em. He shot my wife and my twin girls... There was no way I could stop it from happenin' because speed was never my strong point..." He broke down and you took him into your arms, silently crying with him. Your hands rubbed his back and you cooed at him in an attempt to help him calm down. He was clinging to you as if his life depended on it and by the looks of it... His life did depend on your embrace at the moment, "I couldn't do anything. Reyes found me.... He found me holdin' my three girls... I don't even fully remember what happened after... I apparently agreed to become part of Overwatch. I don't remember what was said, it's like I blacked out for an entire week. Reyes had to talk to me and tell me what had happened several times after he found me..."

"You're okay now. I've got you. I'm sorry you had to deal with such a thing, Jesse." You pulled away from him long enough to kiss him. It didn't matter if he tasted like vomit and bad whiskey. He needed to feel loved at the moment, "Now, stand up. Let's go. I will cuddle with you in bed, okay?"

You helped him wash his hands, face and neck again then helped him to bed. You helped him take his pants off so he could be more comfortable, then stripped down to your underwear with him. You flopped down beside him and pulled him into your arms. Skin to skin contact always helped Jesse McCree calm down when he was upset or stressed. It seemed to be helping him calm down now. His breathing slowed and his shaking stopped.

_How can blood be our salvation_  
_And justify the pain that we have caused throughout the times_  
_Will I learn what's truly sacred?_  
_Will I redeem my soul, will truth set me free?_

"I'm sorry I broke down like that." He whispered, his head on your chest, "I feel lighter after finally talkin' 'bout it with someone..."

"You can start the healing process now, I'll help. Your family wouldn't want you to be so sad. They wouldn't want you to suffer like this."

"They... They really wouldn't want me to be sad like this."

"Your current family doesn't want you to suffer and be sad either."

"My... Current family?"

"Mhm." You moved his hand to your lower belly and he started shaking again.

"You're...?"

"I am."

Jesse started sobbing loudly and you began to think he was going back into depressed mode again until he climbed up and kissed you passionately. His hand was still on your belly.

"How long?"

"Seven weeks. Angela... She thinks it's twins..."

He moved down and kissed your belly, "I'm gettin' another chance. This time... I promise I will not fail this time... I make this promise to all three of you. I'm older, stronger, and wiser now. This time there will be a happy ending."


End file.
